Awkward greetings are the hallmark of corporate amurrika. They are so embarrasing. And I definitely hoard embarrassing moments to replay torturously over and over in my head.
Ex-coworker (let's call him N) was in town.
Came into the office to say hi.
Approached my desk with right arm raised high, so I assumed this would be a hug (even though we'd worked together for all of 2 months and never hugged before) so I matched with an equally high left arm.
Only to see his swoop down into handshake formation.
I try to do the same.
Too late.
OMG.
The situation had become too confusing at this point.
N tries to dispel the awkwardness: "You want a hug? I'll give you a hug"
Ok. I guess.
We try to maneuver the one-armed kind of hug that New Yorkers reserve for the type of acquaintanceship where you've worked on like half a project together but you don't know their middle name or their kids' ages.
But I ended up going with the wrong arm.
So while he hugged me with his right arm, I went with my right arm also.
Just imagine what that looks like.
